In this part of Asia, neon is very popular for any shop - regardless of what it sells. If it's good enough for a hof (bar), it's good enough for a medical clinic. It is simply a way to attract the public’s attention. For me, neon symbolises pubs, clubs and casinos. This was made crystal clear when I walked into a neon-encased building in order to try and dull my crumbling mind with a few beers. I got to the front desk and was confronted with a pile of leaflets advertising Dr. Lee's urinary and gynaecological clinic (est. 1956). I realised I was in a totally different world and I was less schooled in it than the children I was teaching.

Keeping on the ball

The feeling that came over me in the instant that I opened my mouth, is one that I have since become familiar with. However, at the time, I would have gladly disembowelled myself with pins rather than have to repeat that first five minutes of my educating experience.

"Hiya, my name is Dan and I am from England, you are lucky enough to have the very best of British as your teacher for the next year." This fell on deaf ears. My follow up of, "It is quite hot and I apologise if I sweat on you," went down the same way. It was in that moment of silence, with thirteen little Korean faces all looking at me as if I was a three headed lady-boy, that I realised I had absolutely no idea how to relate to kids, let alone teach them. Especially kids who were so inherently different to me. I didn’t want to fail at the first hurdle but I was stumped. What do you say to children, who can't speak your language, don't want to learn your language on a hot summer morning half way through their school holiday, and have never heard an English accent before?

You say, "David Beckham". The response was an overwhelming relief. Being an Arsenal fan I have never been especially happy to hear Beckham’s name. But in that humid South Korean classroom, it was all I could do to keep the joy from my face. For the next hour I proceeded to outline the superiority of Arsenal's back four; explained the '91-'92 season in detail; and even managed a small game of table football. All with children that had only the most basic grasp of English. I showed them how to volley rolled up bits of paper into the bin, I gave them all English nicknames from Arsenal players past and present. I think I actually bonded with them in the one hour we spent together. I left that first class feeling as if I could move mountains. Unfortunately I left my next class feeling like I had been squashed by one. The magic of Beckham just didn't work on the eight year-olds, who saw me as a climbing frame instead of a teacher.

In Korea, students work like pit ponies. During term time they attend school. After school they might have four hours of extracurricular activities. After that they have to do their homework. Some of the kids I was teaching wouldn't get more than five hours sleep a night. They were all expected to go on to university and they seemed to have a great deal of pressure placed on them by their families. Teaching them inspired me to try and spend my leisure time more creatively. I grew up thinking that after the mandatory six hours of school the rest of the day should be spent doing as little as possible. This carried over to my adult life. Being in an environment where all the students were dedicated to learning and trying to achieve the best they could rubbed off on me to the extent that I am currently learning to play the violin and am taking Italian lessons.

It has taken me about five months to settle into the Korean way of life. I can read a little Korean now so I can at least understand menus and shop signs. I can speak it less well, but enough to ask directions and tell my students to behave. I think my brain has accepted a less frantic pace and I quite enjoy the relative solitude. I still live on the very surface of a complex society and understand very little of what goes on around me. I am sure that my behaviour seems strange to the natives. However I have mastered the culture shock and am beginning to overcome the language barrier. I believe I am coming to appreciate many aspects of a completely different way of life.

Feedback:
"Great article, has this man got it in him to write a travel book?" Dan's Mum [!!]